In my previous post on ” self worth ” I talked about placing value to your life . in order to be valued you need to do things that are valuable. Which is why I’m introducing you to the path called change .
Are you scared of Change ?
The process of becoming different .
There’s a positive change and a negative change . change is a transition . you can change from positive to negative or from negative to positive . what causes change is influence , positive influence or negative influence .
Let’s talk about the negative change .
My name is bella ,I’m from a decent home, we all grew up with just a routine of going to church , school and then back home. I just gained admission into college . college is my freedom away from home , away from my controlling parents, I’m about to make new friends .Few days later I make some friends in church . this is what mum would have always wanted , I don’t want to disappoint them so having friends who go to church is a good start.
Someone called my friend asking her to come to a party , I haven’t gone to a party before . I agreed on going with them . At the party I was offered a beer which I rejected because I don’t drink . I got a soft drink instead . I saw my friend drinking beer and smoking cigarette. I was so shocked .
Fast forward to months later , I held a cigarette in my hand in the club , my shorts under my ass, a crop top reveling my belle button . I danced on a strip pole still smoking my cigarette .
I want you to be the judge of this lifestyle .is it a negative change or a positive one .
Let’s take another example
Years later , my grades in school dropped . my parents found out I smoked and partied. They were ashamed of me . I upgraded from smoking cigarette to smoking weed but something happened.
I met a new friend who introduced me to the light. She talked to me of how my lifestyle would ruin me , she showed me who I was and who I were . I was broken in the spirit . I never listened to anyone to but I listened to her .
She made a promise never to leave me but to help me until I see the light . I made a promise to myself to stop smoking which was difficult but I scaled through it . I disciplined myself enough to accept such change . then I saw clearly what has been going on in my life . it was like my eyes was open to see how I have wasted time doing all sort of rubbish all in the name of fun .
She said if you must keep this new person that you have become you can’t associate with the people that still does it . you can talk to them and help them but you can’t be found in their midst when they are doing it .
I stopped going to the club with my friends everyday . I went only on special occasion . I was focused in my studies . my friends became angry I wasn’t doing what they were doing and whenever I talked to them to accept this change in their lives they felt I was showing myself . they felt I was pretending to be who I wasn’t , they felt I was criticizing them when I only wanted to help .
So I walked away from my friends and now I’m in somewhere different . my grades improved , my parents accepted me again . my life changed .
Take a look at that girls life imagine she never listened to her new friend she would still be stuck in that old lifestyle , but she decided on accepting change without thinking of what it would cost . it might cost you your friends then know its time to let go of them and move on . the negative change cost her ,her relationship with her parents but the positive change caused her , her relationship with her friends. Do you prefer to lose your parents love than lose your friends love?. Choose wisely.
What change do you want in your life . don’t expect people to understand what’s going on in your life . they don’t see your path . change is a mindset that is evidential in your attitude .
Once you change your mindset about your life from negative to positive you will see the difference in your life .
The road to change is not swift neither is the road of life . there was never a successful sailor without a stormy sea . what direction is your boat going . can you see your path clearly or its filled with fog .
Don’t be afraid of change same way you shouldn’t be afraid of losing people . there’s a light at the other side of the tunnel . whoever you know doesn’t deserve to be in your life , let them go .
Why be drawn backward by people when you can move forward by yourself . no one is tied to your destiny . its all you . you can cause a difference in your life . only you can bring about that difference you want to see .
If taking up that jamb form and deciding you are going to school then do it with faith . if its quitting that bad habit that you thought you couldn’t do without then quit it. If its leaving that toxic relationship that you know its not beneficial to you then leave it .
Cause at the end of the day you will be the one to suffer to consequence or enjoy it . I’m not trying to make you feel bad but if this strikes you then know you need a turn around in your life .
Its time to make that change in your life. Its time don’t let anyone waste your time . make that new turn and don’t be scared of being alone.
You discover yourself being alone taking a step back from everyone and watching to see if this is what you want in your life . changing the bad habits for the good ones . its time .